This is a tough post to write.I worked for almost a year after I got sick from mono and POTS,and would drag myself home every night.I remember pulling the car into the garage,and plastering on a smile for my two children...until the day came that I couldn't keep plastering on a smile and hide my illness from them.He is 13 ,she is 6(and 1/2!!) and they are precious to me.The funniest thing about all the smile plastering I was doing,is that they both saw right though it to what lay beneath...Mom is really sick.
The hardest thing to do ,is to have to tell them "no" when they want to do something fun because I don't feel well. Also tough is the amount of napping I require just to be able to function.My 13 year old has been wonderful in helping out in this area,he will play a video game with his little sister,or turn a movie on for her,something to occupy her time until I wake up.Its hard not having that"Go Go Go!!!"lifestyle that I had before,I miss it a lot.It's tough not being able to drive and depend on other people to get me places I used to be able to just hop in my car and go to by myself.But the hardest thing of all is learning to accept the mother that I have become to my sweet kids,and knowing that super mom will probably not be returning to my life.The kids understand this and want me to do whatever I can to feel better.If that is a nap,they want me to take one,then I can wake up,and make cookies for them,or watch a movie.Chronic Illness sucks,not just for you,who physically deal with it,but for your family and friends,who deal with it on a emotional basis.